How Do We Tell the Poor from the Lazy?

How do we tell the poor from the lazy for the purposes of charity and should it matter? 

2 Thessalonians 3:10-11(NKJV)

10For even when we were with you, we commanded you this: If anyone will not work, neither shall he eat. 

11For we hear that there are some who walk among you in a disorderly manner, not working at all, but are busybodies. 

I've always found this juxtaposition interesting and puzzling.  Maybe I have found a clue.

On the one hand we have Jesus telling us to feed and care for the poor.  On the other hand we have Paul telling us that if anyone will not work, neither should he eat. 

So which is it?  How do we chose who are the poor who deserve charity and who are the lazy malcontents who don't?

Do all deserve charity?  I believe the Bible is pretty clear that no, not all deserve charity. 

Here is just one example. 

1 Timothy 5:3-8(NKJV)

3Honor widows who are really widows. 

4But if any widow has children or grandchildren, let them first learn to show piety at home and to repay their parents; for this is £good and acceptable before God. 

5Now she who is really a widow, and left alone, trusts in God and continues in supplications and prayers night and day. 

6But she who lives in pleasure is dead while she lives. 

7And these things command, that they may be blameless. 

8But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.

I think Paul gives us another way to tell who deserves charity and who doesn't in the 2 Thes. 3:11.

11For we hear that there are some who walk among you in a disorderly manner, not working at all, but are busybodies. 

The way I see this, Paul is making the distinction between those who can't work and help themselves from those who refuse to; those who seek to cause strife and dissension instead.  Paul is drawing a distinction of those who deserve the limited resources for charity and those who don't.